TODAY’S GENIUS AWARD GOES TO . . . . . . .
Austin Hatfield, 18, a Florida man who was hospitalized after he tried to kiss a poisonous cotton-mouth snake.
Hatfield had captured the snake from his girlfriend’s yard several days before and was keeping it in a pillowcase on his bed.
He occasionally took the snake out to kiss it on the mouth, but the snake decided to end the relationship.
A witness said, “He took it out, put it on his chest and it was acting funny, and it jumped up and got him. He ripped it off his face, threw it on the ground, and he started swelling up immediately.”
He was taken to the ER and was hospitalized.
On the brighter side, his swollen lips will allow him to take the Kylie Jenner Challenge.
AND THEN THERE’S …..
Larry Bowen, 45, a truck driver from Arkansas, who apparently traded $50,000 worth of lunch meat for crack cocaine.
Bowen was driving through Memphis, TN, and stopped at a gas station, where he bumped into two guys selling crack.
He really wanted some, so he made them a deal: all of his meat for some of their crack.
After the trucking company figured out their delivery never made it, they used the GPS to track down their truck and they found Larry at the gas station, eating a sandwich.
The trailer with the meat in it was gone, as were the tires from the truck.
He pleaded guilty to theft and got one year of drug rehab and six years of probation.
OR HOW ABOUT …..
Ronnie Lee Williams, 24, and another unidentified man, who brought a one-year-old baby along when they broke into a house near Birmingham, AL.
A next-door neighbor spotted Williams and another man in action and called the homeowner at work, prompting the man to race home.
Upon arriving, the homeowner interrupted the burglary in progress.
The suspects fled in different directions as the homeowner fired warning shots into the ground, which prompted one of the men to hold the baby in a way to protect him from the gunfire.
The other burglar fled, but Williams, who had a long list of prior convictions, was arrested.
The child’s mother was unaware that her infant had been used as a “shield” by the child’s father, who is currently being sought by police.
OKAY, ONE MORE …..
Amin Dhanani, the owner of a Channelview, TX, Popeye’s restaurant, who fired a pregnant employee after she refused to repay $400 that was robbed from the restaurant at gunpoint.
Dhanini claimed he had warned the woman about keeping too much money in the register several times so when they got robbed it was her responsibility.
Marissa Holcomb, who is a mother of three with a fourth child on the way, responded by saying, “I just had a gun to me, I’m not paying the money.”
An outraged public and pressure from the Popeye’s corporate offices forced the owner to apologize and offer the woman her old job back and $2,000 in back pay.