TODAY’S GENIUS AWARD GOES TO . . . . . . .
Cody Caldwell, 19, a burglar in Huron, California, who died trying to do the ol’ Santa Claus act by sliding down the chimney.
Caldwell got stuck and when the people inside lit a fire the next day he started screaming for help.
The resident heard the screams, extinguished the fire and called 911.
By the time firefighters got him out he was dead, probably from smoke inhalation.
AND THEN THERE’S …..
Alton Brown, 60, (no, not the Food Network guy) who failed in his “frivolous” lawsuit claiming that USA Today ruined his illegal jailhouse gambling operation by deciding to stop publishing Las Vegas betting.
Brown sued Larry Kramer, the newspaper’s former publisher and president, for USA Today’s decision to stop publishing Las Vegas betting odds and other such gambling data on sporting events.
The judge said since gambling by prisoners is forbidden by the state Department of Corrections, the case never had a chance.
Brown is a prison inmate and has a record of filing frivolous lawsuits.
OR HOW ABOUT …..
Someone in Winfield, Kansas, who dropped off several items to a local Goodwill store… including a live hand grenade.
Processors at the store discovered the grenade as they went through items that were part of a large donation.
They evacuated the store and called police.
A bomb squad arrived and safely removed and detonated the device.
Goodwill does not track its donations and therefore the origins of the donation are not known.
OKAY, ONE MORE …..
Jasbir Singh Bharaj, 46, who might get the award for the worst ever case of air rage after unleashing racial abuse on fellow flyers.
Witnesses say Bharaj threatened to punch a flight attendant and bit a police officer after being asked to quiet down.
He also swore and unleashed a series of racist rants.
He concluded by dipping his finger in wine and rubbing it onto his private parts.
He caused £2,500 ($3,758) worth of damage to the in-flight entertainment system.
Bharaj was sentenced to a total of 11 months in jail for his actions.