TODAY’S GENIUS AWARD GOES TO……
A 47-year-old Adrian, Michigan woman lost her job after police determined she put laxatives in a departing co-worker’s going-away brownies.
Police were called to MMI Engineered Solutions after the company received a tip from an employee that the woman planned to put laxatives in brownies she was bringing to a send-off for another worker.
The company intervened, confiscated the suspect brownies, and called police before the brownies could be eaten. When interviewed by police, the 47-year-old initially denied putting laxatives in the brownies. But when informed the brownies would be forensically-tested for tampering, she admitted to baking in a cube of laxatives.
AND THEN THERE’S……
Police were called to investigate a domestic disturbance in a southern German town — and found a man arguing with a parrot.
A resident in Loerrach, near the Swiss border, called the emergency number Monday to report his concerns about loud shouting from a next-door apartment that had been going on for some time.
Police said Tuesday that officers sent to the scene found there was a loud argument going on — but it was between a 22-year-old man and a parrot. The man told them he had been annoyed with the bird, which belonged to his girlfriend.
The parrot responded to being shouted at with loud noises of its own. Police said it couldn’t speak but could bark like a dog. Since no one was hurt, the officers left.
OR HOW ABOUT……
56-year-old Norman Keith Wightman of Greenwood, South Carolina was arrested and charged with indecent exposure after he blamed his nudity on snake bites.
A Greenwood police officer found a man running naked at about 4:20 a.m. last Saturday. The man told officers he had been looking for snakes earlier, and there were now snakes in his pants.
He told police that when the snakes began biting him, he undressed on the side of the road in plain view of motorists and took off running away from the snakes. An officer found the man’s pants on South Main Street but found no other clothing.
The officer who wrote the report did not mention seeing snakes at the scene. The man reportedly appeared to be under the influence of drugs, although he denied taking any illicit substances. He also asked to be taken to the hospital but would not explain why he wanted to go.
OKAY, ONE MORE……
Firefighters in Indianapolis, Indiana said that a woman hit the accelerator instead of the brake in her brand-new car and drove through the wall of an apartment… Her own apartment.
Pictures tweeted by the Indianapolis Fire Department show the white Chevy Malibu stuck through the window of an apartment at the Winchester Lakes complex. The entire front end of the car was inside the apartment after the crash.
A look from inside the apartment shows the car hovering several feet above a couch and dining room table, with debris scattered about the room. Thankfully, firefighters say no one was injured in the accident. Crews were dispatched to check the structure for stability.