TODAY’S GENIUS AWARD GOES TO……
A man who was recently arrested for auto theft had a small diaper-clad monkey clinging to his chest when Florida cops apprehended him after he drove the hot wheels into a ditch.
Investigators allege that 23-year-old Cody Blake Hession took a vehicle from the driveway of a St. Petersburg residence. He then drove the car about thirty-five miles to Holiday, a Tampa-St. Pete suburb, where he “drove off the edge of a parking lot, into a ditch.”
When Pasco County Sheriff’s Office deputies detained Hession, who had fled the vehicle, there was a leashed Capuchin monkey attached to his pink polo shirt. Hession told deputies that he had obtained the male monkey, named Monk, years ago from a breeder in South Carolina.
Since Hession did not have an exotic animal permit, the monkey was placed in the custody of the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission. Charged with auto theft, Hession was booked into the Pasco County jail on the felony rap. He may also face a charge for possessing an unlicensed monkey.
AND THEN THERE’S……
A Kentucky State Police trooper, a retired State Police colonel, and a county coroner have been accused of several crimes including transporting moonshine and eyeballs.
Scott County Coroner John Goble and retired State Police Lt. Col. Mike Crawford were indicted Thursday on multiple counts of receiving stolen property. The charges stem from the theft of $40,000 worth of ammunition and weapons.
State Police began investigating the theft in December and placed Master Trooper Robert M. Harris on unpaid leave. He’s accused of providing stolen items to Goble and Crawford. Harris has been indicted on unlawful taking and second-degree forgery.
Goble also is accused of transporting a pair of donor eyes and moonshine, as well as possessing 90 Oxycodone tablets. It’s unclear if they have lawyers.
OR HOW ABOUT……
Police said that a private garbage truck’s drunk driver lost control of his massive rig and slammed into several cars, a tree, and a Brooklyn resident’s front gate on Saturday.
40-year-old Anthony Castaldo was in a drunken stupor while driving down 60th St. between 19th and 20th avenues in Borough Park about 5:20 a.m. when he somehow lost control of the wheel.
The 64,000-pound truck crushed eight parked vehicles — knocking them around like Matchbox cars — before slamming into a tree and coming to a stop in someone’s front yard, steps from the stoop.
Castaldo climbed out of his truck and ran off, but was quickly arrested by police. One of the cops injured his elbow and hand during the pursuit. Police charged Castaldo with resisting arrest, drunken and reckless driving, and leaving the scene of an accident.
OKAY, ONE MORE……
A Minnesota man is facing twenty-two new criminal charges in Wisconsin in connection with what authorities say was a scam in which senior citizens paid for snow removal services that were never delivered.
Matthew D. Erickson is accused of selling pre-paid snow removal services and never providing those services. Some of the theft charges rise to felony status because of a provision in state law known as an elder abuse enhancer that applies in some cases where victims are 60 years or older.
The Better Business Bureau began investigating Erickson and his company, Snow Angels, in January after receiving two complaints of pre-paid snow removal services that were never completed.