TODAY’S GENIUS AWARD GOES TO……
When firefighters in Niceville, Florida arrived at a home last week they could see smoke coming from inside. A naked man opened the front door, said “I’m sorry,” and closed the door.
Police officers arrived shortly after to assist. The man came to the door again, left it open and went back into the house. The man reportedly showed no signs of understanding the danger he was in. There were several things on fire inside the home, including some towels.
Based on the fire department’s investigation, the man allegedly tried baking cookies on a George Foreman grill which he left unattended. The grill and cookies caught fire, so he put dry towels on top of the grill. Those caught fire, too, causing the fire to spread.
The man admitted to drinking two liters of vodka and smoking marijuana starting around 9:00 a.m. that morning. He was examined at the scene and had no life-threatening injuries, the report said.
AND THEN THERE’S……
A man accused of kicking a seagull that tried to eat his cheeseburger at a New Hampshire beach has been fined $124.
Police investigated the report from a bystander at Hampton Beach earlier this summer. NH1 reports the man, Nate Rancloes, said he had just returned from getting a cheeseburger and fries and was sitting on the sand.
He said seagulls got to the burger, and he spun around with his leg to shoo one away, but struck the bird. He said it was a simple mistake.
OR HOW ABOUT……
Police arrested a jilted Florida woman who allegedly began swinging an ax when her girlfriend tried to dump her. Jeanette Alexandra Suarez allegedly became so upset her girlfriend of three months wanted to end their relationship Wednesday morning that she punched the woman in the face.
The 25-year-old then allegedly began destroying belongings at their apartment. Authorities said that when the girlfriend called 911, Suarez reportedly hit her. The police report said Suarez then retrieved an ax, which she used to threaten the 46-year-old girlfriend.
Suarez was arrested outside the apartment and booked at Stock Island Detention Center. She faces charges of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, criminal damage, and battery.
OKAY, ONE MORE……
Pins weren’t the only thing knocked down at Nottoway, Virginia Bowling Alley on Sunday when a driver crashed her car through the building, knocking down a wall and coming to a stop between bowling lanes. Last Sunday, shortly before 3:00 a.m., Virginia State Police responded to a single vehicle crash into a building at the Nottoway Bowling Alley.
The preliminary investigation revealed that a 2007 Ford Taurus driven by 20-year-old Rhiannon M. Heller was reversing from a parking spot and then put her car in drive striking a parked car. She then hit the accelerator and veered through the grass before driving through the building.
Heller was arrested and charged with underage possession by consumption and reckless driving. Additional charges may be pending per consultation with the Commonwealth Attorney as the crash remains under investigation.