TODAY’S GENIUS AWARD GOES TO……
According to an FBI affidavit, a Colorado man is facing federal charges after allegedly groping a female airline passenger and then urinating on the seat in front of him. 45-year-old Michael Allen Haag was traveling from Denver to Charleston, South Carolina on Frontier Airlines when he became unruly and disrupted the flight.
Haag, drinking double vodka and tonics, told a woman seated next to him that he was traveling to South Carolina to meet with an old girlfriend and was “physically excited.” The woman said Haag pestered her with personal questions and kept looking at her “chest and legs as she was wearing a tank top and shorts.”
After touching another female passenger and being moved to the back of the plane, Haag removed his seatbelt “and started urinating on the seat in front of him.” Upon landing in South Carolina, Haag was removed from the aircraft by officers with the Charleston Aviation Authority Police Department.
AND THEN THERE’S……
A man with facial tattoos was arrested in Clearwater Beach, Florida this weekend after police said he climbed atop a piece of playground equipment and began telling children about where babies come from.
Police Officers said that 30-year-old Otis Ryan was initially approaching tourists and making inappropriate comments to women in an effort to get their male partners to confront him. An officer in the area was watching him at the time.
An officer said in his arrest report, “I watched him walk over to the busy playground area and climb to the top of one of the children’s toys that was being occupied by children between the ages of 4 and 6. He then started shouting from the top telling the children that babies come out of women.”
Police noted that Ryan has caused a number of disturbances in the area recently — and jail records show a number of arrests over the last year on charges of disorderly conduct, battery, and carrying a concealed weapon.
OR HOW ABOUT……
63-year old Joseph John Musso of Gulf Breeze, Florida was caught walking around a neighborhood naked while carrying a bottle of cooking oil.
The Santa Rosa County Sheriff’s Office received a call from a homeowner saying home security footage caught a naked man, later identified as Musso, walking around near his home.
When deputies arrived, they saw him walking with a plastic bottle of cooking oil because he “liked to rub it on his legs.” After a brief chase, and a struggle to handcuff Musso, a deputy used a Taser and arrested him.
Musso told deputies that “he receives sexual gratification by being naked in public.” He also admitted to running around the neighborhood naked before. According to county court records, Musso faces charges of indecent exposure, lewd and lascivious behavior, resisting an officer, and loitering.
OKAY, ONE MORE……
Irked by a delay in the take-off of a Mumbai bound flight, a 37-year-old man allegedly under the influence of alcohol inflicted self-injury by using a pen to stab himself after a verbal spat with airline officials.
The passenger was scheduled to board Air India’s 2.30 a.m. Mumbai flight. However, when the flight was delayed for about three hours he questioned the airline officials, which led to a verbal duel.
The man told the officials that he ran the risk of missing his connecting flight at Mumbai and, in a seeming fit of rage, he took out a pen and punched his stomach, causing bleeding. The passenger was taken to a hospital within the airport premises for treatment and the flight later departed without him.