TODAY’S GENIUS AWARD GOES TO……
Moscow, RUS — A scorned wife raided her ex-husband’s cryogenics lab and stole the frozen brains of people who hoped to be brought back to life. 59-year-old Valeria Udalova and staff from her company grabbed the remains of people who paid thousands of pounds hoping they could be resurrected. Some of the corpses were from Britain and the U.S. and were stored in Valeria’s ex-husband, Danila Medvedev’s, lab in the Moscow region of Russia.
Reports say that the lab is Russia’s leading cryo-storage facility. They drained liquid nitrogen from giant Dewar flasks containing frozen bodies and grabbed these and some detached human brains, then loaded them on trucks. Police were called and intercepted the macabre cargo of human remains preserved by “Frankenstein” technology offering humans the chance to “come back to life” in future.
But Medvedev told RTVi: “The police did not catch Valeria. She left, taking someone’s brain from the cryo-storage. The brains of our neuro-patients were kept separately, in special metal medical boxes.” Police are now examining the rival claims while demanding the feuding ex-spouses guarantee the “integrity” of the frozen corpses and brains as well as the bodies of dozens of dogs and cats that owners wanted to bring back to life in the future.